Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch

  • The book is in very good condition with slight shelf wear.

$16.00



Product Description

There is a distinct hint of Armageddon in the air. According to The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch (recorded, thankfully, in 1655, before she blew up her entire village and all its inhabitants, who had gathered to watch her burn), the world will end on a Saturday. Next Saturday, in fact. So the armies of Good and Evil are amassing, the Four Bikers of the Apocalypse are revving up their mighty hogs and hitting the road, and the world’s last two remaining witch-finders are getting ready to fight the good fight, armed with awkwardly antiquated instructions and stick pins. Atlantis is rising, frogs are falling, tempers are flaring. . . . Right. Everything appears to be going according to Divine Plan.

Except that a somewhat fussy angel and a fast-living demon — each of whom has lived among Earth’s mortals for many millennia and has grown rather fond of the lifestyle — are not particularly looking forward to the coming Rapture. If Crowley and Aziraphale are going to stop it from happening, they’ve got to find and kill the Antichrist (which is a shame, as he’s a really nice kid). There’s just one glitch: someone seems to have misplaced him. . . .

First published in 1990, Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett’s brilliantly dark and screamingly funny take on humankind’s final judgment is back — and just in time — in a new hardcover edition (which includes an introduction by the authors, comments by each about the other, and answers to some still-burning questions about their wildly popular collaborative effort) that the devout and the damned alike will surely cherish until the end of all things.


Amazon.com Review
Pratchett (of Discworld fame) and Gaiman (of Sandman fame) may seem an unlikely combination, but the topic (Armageddon) of this fast-paced novel is old hat to both. Pratchett’s wackiness collaborates with Gaiman’s morbid humor; the result is a humanist delight to be savored and reread again and again. You see, there was a bit of a mixup when the Antichrist was born, due in part to the machinations of Crowley, who did not so much fall as saunter downwards, and in part to the mysterious ways as manifested in the form of a part-time rare book dealer, an angel named Aziraphale. Like top agents everywhere, they’ve long had more in common with each other than the sides they represent, or the conflict they are nominally engaged in. The only person who knows how it will all end is Agnes Nutter, a witch whose prophecies all come true, if one can only manage to decipher them. The minor characters along the way (Famine makes an appearance as diet crazes, no-calorie food and anorexia epidemics) are as much fun as the story as a whole, which adds up to one of those rare books which is enormous fun to read the first time, and the second time, and the third time…

Recent Comments
  1. James D. DeWitt @ 10:20 am

    Bad news. The Apocalypse is coming. Soon. Luckily, Heaven and Hell have left the business with the Anti-Christ in the hands of Crowley and Aziraphale, demon and angel respectively. Now they have misplaced the Anti-Christ and pretty much decided they really like humanity a lot more than their either of their bosses.

    In the first edition, the full title of this book was “The Nice & Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch.” “Nice,” in this context, meaning precisely correct. Agnes saw it all coming, from her being burned alive as a witch to the air force base where Armageddon will begin (“Peas is our professiune.”). Agnes, her descendant, Anathema, the Four Horseman – Horsepersons – and the Other Four Horseman (a different chapter of Hell’s Angels); it all comes together with the serried ranks of angels and demons gathered overhead.

    Yes, this is an hysterically funny book. A satire and a parody, it lampoons everything in sight. From Elvis sightings to televangelists to the destruction of all intelligent life (“nothing left but dust and fundamentalists.”), little escapes the scathing wit of Gaiman and Pratchett.

    Of course the demon, Crowley, drives a 1926 Bentley. Of course any tape left in its glove box for more than two weeks turns into something by Queen. Of course the flaming sword used by War is delivered to her by International Express.

    And what happens to the telephone solicitor, Lisa Morrow? Come on now, you secretly thought all telephone solicitors deserved it, right?

    In the tradition of Jonathan Swift and Mark Twain, the satire makes a point. That point may be unpalatable to the religiously inflexible, or to those whose sense of righteousness hampers their sense of humor. Critics of Swift and Twain would find much to criticize in Good Omens. But Pratchett and Gaiman demonstrate that we don’t need Heaven or Hell to have Good and Evil in the world; we have all we need in ourselves. It’s the humanity of Adam Young, the Adversary, the Angel of the Bottomless Pit, etc., it’s his human-ness that ultimately makes all the difference.

    Don’t read this book in bed; you’ll keep your spouse awake, laughing out loud. But there’s nothing else bad that can be said about it. Ineffability may be beyond our understanding, but humor, even humor in the face of the End of the World, we can understand.

    Try this book. I will predict, with Agnes, you’ll like it.

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  2. Elderbear @ 11:12 am

    A couple years ago we did a lot of driving during vacation. My wife read this book to me while I drove, and the kids (11 & 6) listened in. (Soon after vacation, we got a second black cat. As we already had one named Aleister, this one got named Aziraphale. She’s sitting on my lap, begging for attenion right now!)

    This is a comedy of errors about the eschaton, the Antichrist, and Armageddon. My wife & I grew up taking the Apocalypse quite seriously. That served only to make this book funnier. Our children, who couldn’t tell an antichrist from an anti-Chrystler, found the book entertaining as well.

    Fast read. Lots of fun. If you’ve read all of Douglas Adams’ books and are hungering for more, this is the book for you! You might consider following it with Terry Prachett’s Small Gods.

    (If you enjoyed this review, please leave positive feedback. To see more of my reviews, click on the “about me” link above. Thanks!)

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  3. Benjamin @ 12:53 pm

    God, this was intelligent. God, this was funny. God, this was well-plotted. God, this was the Apocalypse.

    I suppose I should say more. Here goes:

    Crowley, the snake who initially tempts Eve in the Garden of Eden, decides, along with the angel who initially watched over them, that the human race isn’t all that bad. Though the Apocalypse is on them, complete with the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse riding Harleys and a switched-at-birth Antichrist who doesn’t realize that he’s the Antichrist, perhaps the world shouldn’t end after all.

    Crowley is an intensely cool character, neither completely bad nor completely good. He takes his job of condemning souls to Hell not too seriously, for he realized a couple centuries ago that human beings faced with enough daily aggravations could condemn themselves.

    The angel Arizaphale, I believe his name was, runs a bookstore collecting rare books and, most aptly, prophecy Bibles. (This and the footnotes in the book are the funniest, most “Hitchhiker’s Guide” moments in it.) Arizaphale realized that human beings should be allowed to continue on in order to keep making art.

    So the two team up with witches, parents and other veddy British personalities to save the world from its supposed end.

    This is very funny.

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  4. Greg Brady @ 2:25 pm

    SYNOPSIS:

    The Antichrist is coming. The world’s about to end. The only problem is the “rank and file” angels and demons (who’ve begun to enjoy each other’s company and understand each other over the eons) aren’t so sure they want Armageddon to come.

    MY TAKE:

    I’ll keep this short. I adore Douglas Adams and the twisted wry humour found in both his “Hitchhiker’s Trilogy” and the books of the Dirk Gently series. The blurb said it was similar. I gave it a try. It was.

    You will especially enjoy this if you have:

    1) a DECENT working knowledge of Christianity (to get some of the subtle digs)

    2) a knowledge of pop culture depictions of evil (the Exorcist movies and the like)

    3) the ability to laugh at your own religious perspectives

    I consider myself an evangelical and thought this was laugh out loud outrageous. But if you’re of the mindset that God can’t take a joke, well, you’re probably better off with a different book…

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  5. Jürgen Klecker @ 4:08 pm

    I once lent this book to I don’t remember who, never got it back – but I wasn’t angry. I was actually GLAD that somebody else obviously loved it as much as I do.

    well, the thing is, everything has been said. I just read all the reviews, and was glad to see I’m not the only one who loved the horsepersons of the apocalypse. But I think old Agnes Nutter (witch), the delivery guy and Thou-shalt-not-commit-adultery Pulsifer deserve at least some honorary mention. I mean, all the characters are hilarious! Pratchett and Gaiman know where it’s at! They answer fundamental questions, like

    …what happens when a US-tv preacher actually meets a real archangel?

    …how can answering machines help a fallen angel in his fight against the dukes of hell?

    … who is responsible for Milton Keynes?

    … what does the hellhound look like?

    … what’s the plan behind London transport?

    And for those who compare this to Douglas Adams’ hitch-hikers series: you are clueless. I mean, you might as well state that Finnegan’s Wake was inferior to Mickey Mouse, or that Bach’s concertos don’t quite live up to “Cats” .

    Good Omens has genuine esprit. Intellectuals can enjoy it. But my 86-year old, working class, staunchly catholic grandma enjoyed it, too.

    Try to beat that.

    So: read it!

    I once had the fortune to attend a lecture held by Terry Pratchett. That was before I read “Good Omens” (back then, I only knes his discworld books). If I ever meet him again, I’ll buy him all the banana daiquiries he asks for.

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